Ok God, one little favor here please.

I wasn't going to post this for fear of jinxing the vibe. Lo and behold I was perfectly capable of ruining things myself. I met this woman recently. We hit it off right away and I like the passionate schmuck that I am went overboard, sending her a card with the lyrics to a song:

I've waited for this day for such a long time
you are everything i've waited for
if memory says i might be disappointed
cause a lifetime here with you will seem to short

all i see is white that's coming towards me
all i've wanted you within my arms
if it's required that i forsake all others
i'll do that and more

i've waited for this day for such a long time
i hope that i can be what you deserve
i hope the days get longer
and make this love grow stronger
god will be the strength and our reason

Looking back on things I was allowing myself to get too infatuated too quickly. Gotta control that. Don't need to be an uncaring prick just not a goopy wuss.
This has got to be a shining example of how I can never be the first one to say I love you to any woman. Ever. I just can't. Not after this. Sometimes nature is a cruel teacher.

I don't know if there's any chance of rectifying this relationship or not. From a cynic's point of view I present no challenge to her. I do not have to be won over and that doesn't sit well with many. From a realist's point of view I was pushing rather than letting things develop on their own. And that part is the saddest part for me. I know that she's a good person. I can feel it when I'm around her. To lose that...........well it hurts. I still seem to want to do things the difficult way.

I've been accused of being too cold and uncaring at times and others I obviously go completely the other way all the way. I'm a very passionate person but I have to learn to control it. I deserve to be happy and be with a woman who's devoted to me as I am to her. But let her express that devotion first. I simply have to.

To say that I'd like another chance with this woman us understating things just a bit. However I just don't know if that will happen. I am sending this out into the universe for all the good vibes I an get. It's time for prayer now. Ok Big Guy, just this once, a do-over please?